Almost 4 Weeks Already!

Can you believe Joshua is almost 4 weeks old?

This week was going pretty well, with increased tolerance (though not full acceptance by any means) of car rides and some longer relaxed happy stretches. By that I mean up to ten minutes of just hanging out before he starts to fuss. Then Wednesday night he was restless in the night and needed about 90 minutes of bouncing to get back to sleep. Last night again he needed 2 hours and later another hour of bouncing in the predawn hours. The good news is that the tv programming is quite good in the middle of the night! I am catching up on old ERs and Greys Anatomy. I am also learning many valuable fashion lessons from Stacy, Clinton, and Tim Gunn.

I started keeping a food log. Wheat has been out of my diet for over 3 weeks now. Dairy has been out for a week or so. Today I had a bowl of yogurt so we'll see what happens. I didn't want to add either until he'd had about three really good days in a row, but I was so starving this afternoon that I caved. He's been somewhat fussy today so unless he has a dramatic reaction, I may not get a clear signal of intolerance.

I took Joshua to the pediatrician today. He weighs 10lbs 4oz (4,650g). His heart and lungs sound terrific. His abdomen looks and palpates fine. We hadn't done the heel prick test I know as "PKU" screening, and Dr. Flores recommended that we do the more exhaustive metabolic disorder screen test, so we will do that on Tuesday.

I'm still on the cloth diapering learning curve. I bought a little of this, little of that so I could figure out what I like and what works best for us and order that kind in the next size up. Well, four weeks in and I just don't know. I'm still trying to figure out how to fashion the perfect blowout-proof Poop Pocket with the prefolds. A lot of people seem to love one size pocket diapers, but they're so bulky up front right now, snapped down to the smallest size. I want to love them, because they have a nice soft liner that keeps baby feeling dry. That wasn't a priority for me because I want to do at least part time EC and I know that he is more likely to stop using diapers sooner if he doesn't get too comfortable in them. That said, I don't want him to have be too uncomfortable either! And he sleeps in such long stretches that his diapers get really soaked and I feel bad for him. His private parts get all wrinkly like he's been in the tub too long!

I found myself thinking that cloth diapers were really not very absorbent at all since they get so wet so fast. But right now he pees about every 10 minutes so of course they're going to get wet fast. And I rarely have a leak, whereas I remember needing to change Micah's leaky disposable diaper- and sleeper- in the middle of the night almost every night when he was younger than Josh is now.

I have been doing some EC. The other day we caught like 4 pees and poops. That was fun. If/when Joshua gets more relaxed I'd like to lay him out on a pile of prefolds or something and REALLY watch his cues and learn his elimination patterns better. But right now he'd last about a minute. So for the time being he's in diapers and covers all the time, with a number of potty opportunities throughout the day. And I change him as soon as I know he has pooped. At this point there's no way I can keep up with all of his pees. I'm hopeful that as he grows and his eliminations become less frequent and more regular/predictable, we'll be able to really get into an EC groove.

Joshua has already grown out of the cover I crocheted for him. I'll have to get going on the next size. I wonder if I can get two out of the wool I have left. I like the wool covers because I know they breathe, and the ones with the little legs contain blowouts better. The down side is that because the wool absorbs the wetness, a little gets wicked onto the baby's clothes. They just feel a little damp to the touch though, not wet like a leak would make them. I must say that the Bummis Whisper Wrap covers are really good. They do live up to their reputation. The Berry Plush minky cover truly is adorable and works decently over a prefold or fitted diaper, but I've had a few messes with the snap in insert so I'm not convinced of its value as an All In One diaper. I'm not sure about the Kissaluvs fitted diapers. They're great for Andrew who hasn't had a complete orientation to the cloth diapering world yet (but is putting in an excellent effort and being totally supportive), and I haven't had a leak. But then they just somehow feel even MORE wet than the prefolds when they're wet. Maybe I'm just being silly. But Joshua had some diaper rash in his first couple of weeks so I'm paranoid of anything that might cause its return.

I do like five loads of laundry a day. I don't know what has happened. I only wash diapers every two days and Joshua usually makes it through the day in a single outfit, so how has my load increased so much? Oh wait.... Could it be the copious number of "accidents" the older two are having lately? Well, this too shall pass... (and at least it's not puddle accidents, right?)

Our First Catch!!

This morning when Joshua woke up I took him straight for a change, knowing that he usually eliminates as soon as he wakes up. His diaper was dry so I took him to the toilet. I held him over the toilet, back against my belly, my hands under his thighs. And he peed and poo'd!! So fun!!

A Great Elimination Communication Article

I want to share this great article about raising your baby without diapers by Dr. Sarah J. Buckley. I liked the whole article, but this paragraph stood out to me.

This is not a method of toilet training, as some have misinterpreted. Rather it is an enlightening process for baby and mother (and possibly other carers) that makes conventional toilet training unnecessary, because our babies have never learned to ignore their body's signals. Neither is EC a way of making babies control their bladder or bowels prematurely, coercively, or traumatically. It does, however, dissolve the illusion that children have no control over elimination until the toddler years.

Official Declaration

I officially declare Micah to be a Big Boy. He has been dry at night for weeks, and doing well enough during the day to wear undies all the time. He looks so cute in his undies! Sure, there have been some accidents (especially on vacation- I did so much handwashing for various reasons), but overall he is doing great! It turns out that his urine makes his legs really itchy. So even when he does have an accident, generally it is not a flood because he remembers that terribly itchy feeling.

Way to go, Micah!!!

All Micah

Pretty typical weekend Micah... nudie boy watching a movie.

Since I posted about his dry day, he totally regressed in the potty training department. He got sick and the antibiotics gave him the runs, so we had to go back to the pullups. After a couple of weeks of that, even when his diarrhea resolved he got very relaxed about his toileting. We changed more dirty diapers in the course of a few weeks than we had in the whole previous year, I think! Thankfully, that ugly phase has passed. But he doesn't care to use the toilet for pee if he's got a nice absorbant pullup on. So he does best nude. Generally he will use the toilet or the grass out back if he's naked. If he is wearing anything on his bottom, he just uses that.

I have heard that some kids can be trained with a weekend of nudity. Not ours!

Soon....

Mr. Dirty Pants!

Wouldn't you know it, but the very day after my big EC post Micah starting having accidents and misses like crazy! Yesterday he pooped in the closet and on the bed. Today he pooped in his training pants. All I can do is laugh and shake my head. And clean up.

In Micah's defense, something is a little "off" with his waste management system. Hopefully once that is back on track we can get back on track with moving out of diapers!

Infant Potty Training / Elimination Communication

When Eva was first born, I remember thinking that she would be easy to toilet train because she so hated to be in wet diapers. But within a matter of weeks she became "diaper trained" and no longer complained about being wet or dirty. And in fact, it was a six month struggle to finally untrain her from using her diapers for elimination. I didn't want to go through that with Micah if I could help it.

I thought back to a conversation I had with another mom a number of years ago. She told me that she had been practicing "elimination communication" with her son since he was born. I listened skeptically, thinking to myself that it sounded like too much work. I've changed my mind since then. Isn't it work to change and buy diapers? And to toilet train a toddler? Not to mention the impact diaper use (both disposable and cloth) has on the environment. I also considered the fact that my diapered child spends much of the day sitting on his or her own urine or feces. Not a lot of dignity in that. There are plenty of cultures out there that don't have access to diapers. They must have figured out a solution that works. What is it?

They pay attention to their babies' cues and give them opportunity to eliminate in an appropriate place. According to one article, parents in over 75 countries practice "elimination communication".

6 month old Micah

When Micah was about 4 months old I held him over the toilet. He peed! I became convinced that this concept had merit. It wasn't just a fluke- he would gladly go three of four times that I offered him the opportunity. I would either hold him in a supported squat position over the toilet or put him on a great little potty I got at the local supermarket. (Many EC'ers swear by the Little Bjorn Potty.)

According to EC'ers, newborn babies are adverse to being near their eliminations, and will actually wiggle away after they go, if undiapered. Babies give signals that they need to eliminate, and with close observation a parent or other caregiver can recognize these signals and offer a potty opportunity accordingly. Among these signals are fussiness, squirming, becoming still, and grunting. Some parents choose to go diaper free right from birth. Others start after a few weeks or months. Some do it full time, others part time, and still others occasionally.

Our approach has been halfway between diaper-free and conventional diapering. Until recently, Micah wore disposable diapers day and night. However I would put him on the potty a number of times a day. Most babies need to go after eating and sleeping, so I would often offer him a potty opportunity after he woke up or after he ate. This approach has already saved us lots of diapers. Especially poopy diapers. He is quite regular and happy to use the potty for his daily duty (unfortunately for us this event generally takes place at 6am or earlier). The majority of the last year's poops have gone into the potty or toilet, not into a diaper.

About a week ago I stopped diapering him. He either goes nude or wears his Bummis training pants around the house during the day. He uses pull-ups for sleeping and outings. He's doing fairly well but he has a ways to go yet. He does better when he's nudie than when he's wearing underpants. When he’s wearing a diaper or something diaper-like I guess he slips into the old habit of just peeing in it when he gets the urge. He does wake up dry from his nap now. This after I double-bagged him with some cotton training undies plus the Bummis and he soaked them. Guess he didn’t want to repeat that soggy uncomfortable experience. The other night when he woke up at 2am he asked to go potty, and his pullup was dry. So we are making progress! My goal is to be completely diaper free by the time he is two (next October). I would be thrilled if it were sooner!

A very interesting and awesome side effect to "EC" is that it strengthens our connection with our son. We are much more observant of him than we might have been- we watch for his elimination signs but it spills into all areas. There is a satisfaction and depth of relationship that results from us successfully reading our baby’s cues and from Micah feeling understood.

If you are interested in EC, check out www.diaperfreebaby.org for more information, or Google "elimination communication", "natural infant hygiene" or "infant potty training".